"God, please help me to make the right decisions."; "God, please let me know what you want me to do."; "God, please help me choose the right path for my future."; "God, let whatever I do be in accordance with your plan."
Have you ever prayed a prayer that at least somewhat resembled one of these? If you were raised in a Christian home, then from the time you were two you probably prayed something like,
"God, pwease hewop me to do good."
If you've ever been caught in a situation where you just don't know, or if you're like me and you've caught yourself thinking about
what in the world your going to do with your life, then you've probably prayed something like,
"God, Give me a sign" or
"God, just let me know..."
I think we've all asked God for guidance at some point in our lives, whether it's because we've hit rock-bottom or because we honestly have no idea what to do! And that's great! We should always seek to make God's priorities our priorities in our lives.
Lately, I've been freaking out about how I'm starting my
last year of high-school, and will soon be going off to
college! That idea seemed so simple just a couple months ago. "I'm just gonna' graduate and go to college! No more. No less." Now it's more like, "
Dude, this is that last year I'll be with my family..." and reality is starting to sink in as I realize that, after this year, I'm going to be living my own life, making my own decisions; and in a way, that's flipping scary.
It's not all bad, though. I also think about all the stupid things I'll do with my friends at four in the morning. I fantasize about getting my band together and jamming whenever we find time, buying that drum set that I want so bad, having a job again. I even look forward to things like serving in the Youth Group at church, as a sponsor this time, working together with awesome people like Chad Monahan, or helping out with the worship team, making music to my heart's content.
Maybe these thoughts seem a little premature. After all, I still have a year of school ahead of me. But of all the years, I know that this one will fly by faster than I can say "Smitty Werbenmanjenson."
When I think about how quickly college will descend upon me, two feelings overtake me. The first is that I desperately want to
not let the future distract me from the now. The second is that I could
do what God wants with my life.
No, let me rephrase that. The second is that I really
don't want to do the
wrong thing with my life. I'll often think about the things I'd love to do with my life, then only to find myself thinking,
"But what if that's not what God wants for my life?";
"What if God has something else in mind?".
Now this especially goes out to other teenagers, but
have you ever felt the same "fear" to go down God's path? I always reassure myself immediately, "
Yeah, but if it's God's plan then it'll be what's best. And I'll probably really like it!" This is true, but do I really
believe that? After all, if I truly trusted God, would I feel any doubt about following His plan? Would I even be
worrying about tomorrow? Jesus Christ, God of the Universe incarnate, even takes His time to tell us not to worry about what will happen tomorrow. And yet I, being human, always manage to find ways to do just that. And yet, don't I trust Him?
Let me quickly show you what I had written as my next paragraph. In an attempt to analyze my irrational fear I wrote,
It's not that I'm scared to please God. If anything, I'm scared of the consequences of not following Him with my life. I'm not scared that it won't be "fun", or that He'll make me do what I hate most. Rather, it's that constant "what if?" that keeps...
And then it hit me like a wall of bricks. That
"what if" reads, "
What if it's not fun?"; "What if I have to do what I hate most?"; "What if I really don't want to do the thing God calls me to?"
That "what if" is the image of the very fear I was so quick to denounce.
And so it is that I find myself in a conundrum of trust: "
I really want to serve God with my life, and I say that I trust Him...but what if?" It seems that no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to overcome that tiny little little voice in the back of my mind saying, "
Yeah, but what if?"
You see, in a situation where I have no idea what to do, my first reaction after worrying is to say, "
God, please remedy this situation," or
"God, please show me exactly what you have in mind so that I can do what you want."
But what if what God is saying is not, "I want
you to do
this," but rather,
"I want to do this in your life. Trust me." What if in all my worrying and wondering "
what if?", I have actually missed the point of it all, that God simply wants me to
trust Him?
I think that in all of life's worries, it is much to easy to take the emphasis off of God, off of His unending grace, His undying love, His undeserved affection, and instead place it on ourselves. Let me explain.
God says,
"I want to do this, and you're just going to have to trust me." but we say,
"Okay then, what can I do?"; "Give me something I can do, God. I don't want to just trust you, I want to have some sense of control over the matter. I promise to do whatever you say, but I want to do it. Just tell me." And while we should definitely ask God what He wants us to do, there are times when
all He is asking us to do is to
trust Him, and sometimes that's not enough for us. We are creatures of worry, and we do not easily put our trust in someone else!
Instead of trusting in His plan, I ask Him to reveal it all so I don't have to feel uneasy. Instead of asking God to do simply what
He wants in my life, I have to ask Him what it is that He wants me to do. And the answer the whole time is simply,
Trust Me. Do you get it?
Trust Me.
Trust God, and all the conundrums disappear. Trust God, and I won't have to see His whole plan in order to follow Him. Trust God, and I will be free not to worry about the future. Trust God, and I will be able to serve Him fully in the now. Trust God, and I can
ask God to do what He wants with my life.
For those of you out there who are like me and have trouble trusting God with our lives, God has some words for you in His message to us. Perhaps among the most well-known is Jeremiah 29:11,
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
And for those of us that still have no idea how in the world it is that we begin to trust God (This is me all the way!), the very next verse is especially appropriate! (Jeremiah 29:12-13)
Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
It's as if God knew exactly what we'd ask when asked to trust Him. If we seek Him with all of our hearts, we
will find Him. The next verse says, "
I will be found by you." And whatever God promises, we can be sure He will fulfill it. In Numbers 23 we read (v.19),
God is not human, that he should lie,
not a human being, that he should change his mind.
Does he speak and then not act?
Does he promise and not fulfill?
God has never, in all of eternity, ever, ever, ever,
not done what He promised. And He promises to see us through, and not only that, but to prosper us, if only we would trust Him. So instead of worrying about what
I'm going to do with my life, I think I'm going to trust that
He already knows what He's going to do with it. In fact, it's all already planned out. I know. I know because He's told me so.